SPOILER ALERT! Quest Breakdown Step 1: Plant the “Fuck the Conformists” sign on the PTA table. Step 2: Meet Randy in the bathroom. Step 3: Learn the Sneaky Squeaker. Step 4: Sneak into the Taco Bell site. Step 5: Defeat the Nazi Zombie. Step 6: Get the Recording Device from the conference room. Step 7: Return the Tape Recorder to the PTA. |
After the elves let you go, shuffle over to the Community Center on South Park’s west side. The whole town is in an uproar about the new Taco Bell site and there’s a big PTA meeting to discuss what to do about it.
You carry your anti-conformist sign through the crowd…and nobody notices. After the meeting breaks up, place the sign on the PTA table. Randy intercepts you and calls you into the bathroom for a private chat. Yo, get your mind out of the gutter. Randy may be weird, but he’s not that kind of weird.
The Sneaky Squeaker
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“Kee ya! You call that farting on someone? You missed by a mile. Try again.” —Randy Marsh |
Okay, so it’s a little weird that Randy’s in a karate suit in the bathroom. Ignore that minor point and concentrate on what he has to tell you about your new farting technique: the Sneaky Squeaker.
When Mr. Mackey unzips at the urinal, try out your new distraction fart. If you can get Mackey to drip, you’ve mastered the Sneaky Squeaker. Now you’ll be able distract opponents and get them to move positions—very useful for sneaking by enemies when you don’t want to be seen. While Mackey’s indisposed, loot his ass before taking off. Chinpokomon (Gophermon) is found inside of the last bathroom stall.
Yo Quiero Taco Bell!
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“Look, it—it’s a simple question. If this is gonna be a HUGE Taco Bell, WILL it serve enchiritos? I think we have a right to know—BLARGH!” —Townsperson |
Randy suggests you check out the Taco Bell site—you know, the one with the big UFO sticking out of ground—so motor up to the north side of town. The government is already camped out waiting for their chalupas.
The two military guards won’t let you just stroll right in. Use your new Sneaky Squeaker to distract the guards. When they step forward to smell who dealt it, slip behind them and through the barricade.
Loot Table: Taco Bell Facility
N = Not Junk / C = Collectable / Q = Quest Item / E = Equipment / D = Dye
| General Area | Location | Item | $$$ Value | N | C | Q | E | D |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Front Gate | Terrance & Phillip backpack in van | Glowing Crystal Fragment | $0.25 | |||||
| Front Gate | Terrance & Phillip backpack in van | Destroyed Laser Pistol | $1.00 | |||||
| Front Gate | Terrance & Phillip backpack in van | Revive Potion | $0.60 | o | ||||
| Front Gate | Terrance & Phillip backpack in van | Moon Rock (Strap-on) | $2.00 | o | o | |||
| Front Gate | Chest on rooftop | Stone Hammer (Melee) | $17.00 | o | o | o | ||
| Front Gate | Chest on rooftop | Rusty Pipe | $0.25 | |||||
| Facility Interior | Loot - Nazi Zombie | Pentagram Patch (Patch) | $1.00 | o | o | |||
| Facility Interior | Loot - Nazi Zombie | Cash | $0.50 | o | ||||
| Facility Interior | Loot - Nazi Zombie | Power Potion | $0.40 | o | ||||
| Facility Interior | Loot - Nazi Zombie | Armband | $0.30 | |||||
| Facility Interior | Loot - Nazi Zombie | Armband | $0.30 | |||||
| Facility Interior | SWAT team member on the right | SWAT Vest (Body) | $10.00 | o | o | o | ||
| Facility Interior | SWAT team member on the right | Cash | $0.75 | o | ||||
| Facility Interior | SWAT team member on the right | Screwdriver | $0.30 | |||||
| Facility Interior | SWAT team member on the right | Fork | $0.10 | |||||
| Facility Interior | SWAT team member on the left | SWAT Tactical Gloves (Hands) | $4.00 | o | o | o | ||
| Facility Interior | SWAT team member on the left | SWAT Armored Headgear (Head) | $7.00 | o | o | o | ||
| Facility Interior | SWAT team member on the left | Cash | $0.75 | o | ||||
| Facility Interior | SWAT team member on the left | Power Potion | $0.40 | o | ||||
| Facility Interior | SWAT team member on the left | USB Drive | $0.50 | |||||
| Conference Room | Cabinet on right side of room | Cash | $1.10 | o | ||||
| Conference Room | Cabinet on right side of room | USB Drive | $0.50 | |||||
| Conference Room | Cabinet on right side of room | Tesla Coil (Strap-on) | $2.00 | o | o | |||
| Conference Room | Cabinet on left side of room | Strength Potion | $0.40 | o | ||||
| Conference Room | Cabinet on left side of room | Armband | $0.30 | |||||
| Conference Room | Cabinet on left side of room | Flat Top Wig (Hair) | $0.40 | o | o | |||
| Conference Room | On top of cabinet on left side of room | Gunrilla (Chinpokomon) | - | o | o | |||
| Conference Room | On table | Recording Device | - | o | o |
One more guard stands watch at the facility entrance. Carefully walk over and power up the generator beside the truck. The loose wires electrify the nearby puddle.
Use your Sneaky Squeaker to lure the guard out until he steps in the puddle. That takes him out. If you get caught by any of the guards, you must restart at the front of the site.
The doors to the military facility are locked. You can find some loot inside the CIA truck with the Taco Bell sign slapped on its side, then use your alien probe to teleport atop the roof. Open the bag under the satellite dish for the Stone Hammer and Rusty Pipe.
Nazi Zombie Apocalypse
You sneak into the facility through the roof air vent and listen in on the government’s plans for South Park. The military is trying to contain a strange, toxic goo that turns anything it touches into Nazi Zombies. We haven’t ruled out the guacamole yet.
The Nazi Zombie escapes and chews up the military guards. It’s up to you to stop the threat. After you spill the Nazi’s guts, collect the SWAT Armor set (SWAT Vest, SWAT Tactical Gloves, SWAT Armored Headgear) from the two guards before entering the conference room. Grab the Tape Recorder from the table. It incriminats the government in a plot to nuke all of South Park destroy the contamination and deny hungry citizens any tacos.
PTA Solutions
Nazi Zombies are now on the loose. Fight the Nazi Zombies in front of the military facility to break free. Return to the Community Center and hand the Recording Device over to the PTA. Randy’s so excited that his conspiracy theories have been justified that he snaps a photo of you with your “Fuck the Conformists” sign in front of the PTA. You now have the proof you need to befriend the Goth Kids.
Return to the Goth Kids behind the school. Notice that the zombie contagion has spread. Zombies have invaded town like hobby nerds at a cosplay convention. If you feel like it, you can interrupt zombies munching on random citizens for extra experience and loot.
Goth Grooves
The Goths are impressed, but they’re not convinced that you have what it takes to sit on the school steps all day and philosophize about death. You must also dance like a Goth. As the dance mini-game plays, press the corresponding colored buttons as the icons scroll up to the burning cigarette timer. Don’t spaz out and you’re in!