Day 1 Quest List
The New Kid in Town Guess who knows no one in town? You. Light up your social network page with friends or you’ll soon be playing alone in the basement with your joystick.
Call the Banners Cartman leads the humans against the dirty, lying, thieving elves. He needs you to recruit three more members to Kupa Keep so you can recover the Stick of Truth.
Hot Coffee Go fetch your first recruit at the Tweek Bros. coffee shop, where the hyperactive Tweek asks you to pick up a “special delivery” for him. Maybe a Red Bull will calm him down?
Gate Crasher Your second target, Token, lives in Dark Meadows. Beat the mace-happy security guard at the gate to recruit an African American into Kupa Keep. Ironic, huh?
Detention Sentence You find out that Craig is stuck in detention. Mr. Mackey treats his detentions very seriously, like “the use of deadly force” serious. Thrash his hall monitors and recover the three hidden keys to recruit your last Kupa Keep member.
The Bard You can’t keep that little twig safe. Now Jimmy the Bard has the Stick of Truth, and you have to survive the Giggling Donkey inn’s defenses to...recover it.
It’s Late Get home to sleep before your parents ground you and you lose all those friends you worked so hard for today. Don’t worry; bedtime is going to be more exciting than Moving Day.
Alien Abduction It’s just your luck that aliens want to kidnap you, and they’re the kind that like to probe your anus. You have to figure out how to use a chunk of extraterrestrial technology shoved up your ass to navigate an alien spacecraft, then return to Earth in time for breakfast.
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