Best Combat Quotes“I think my mom did a pretty sweet job with my costume.” “Walked right into that, huh?” “You mind if I update my status while we’re waiting here?” “Dude, my injuries are super grievous right now.” “You hit like my grandpa.” |
Description: Stan follows the way of the warrior, relying on the sharpness of his wits and sword. Stan’s trusty animal companion, Sparky, can be called into battle or commanded to pee on certain obstacles.
Unlocked: Day 2, Elven Kingdom, before “Attack the School” quest
Specialization: Sparky
Command Ability: Get Sparky to pee on certain objects
Melee Tactics: Stan is built for melee. His sword takes chunks out of opponents’ sides, and if he needs assistance, a whistle call brings Sparky into the fray to chomp on a foe’s crotch with Marked for Death. For maximum carnage, choose Stan’s Way of the Sword and watch him swing and swing and swing at a single enemy.
Ranged Tactics: Rome is known for lions eating Christians, for orgies, and maybe even for what Stan tosses around the battlefield: the discus. Stan’s tribute to an Olympic sport has him slinging a discus with the strength of Hercules and the accuracy of your busy thumb. Nail the release and you can chain your discus throw to strike multiple, random targets.
Multiple-Opponents Tactics: Sure, Stan’s discus may clip other opponents, but it’s unreliable. When you want to inflict bodily harm on multiple foes, draw out his sword and go for Whirlwind Slash. A spinning Cuisinart, Stan chops up foes like ground-up beef, bones and all.
Special Abilities
| Ability | Description | Power Points | Level Unlocked | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
|
|
Marked for Death |
Stan shines his Laser Pointer of the Ranger on the target’s crotch, sending Sparky to attack. |
0 |
0 |
|
|
Discus of Might |
Stan hurls a deadly disc at the target. This disc can chain to random targets. |
4 |
0 |
|
|
Whirlwind Slash |
This spinning sword attack hits multiple foes. |
10 |
0 |
|
|
Way of the Sword |
Stan channels his inner action hero and attacks an enemy with a flurry of blows. |
15 |
11 |
Sparky Stan’s faithful hound Sparky is always one whistle—and one over-enlarged bladder—away from coming to your aid. Outside of combat, you can command Stan to summon Sparky and spray urine on select objects (for example making an electrified puddle bigger). During combat, Stan’s Laser Pointer of the Ranger marks an opponent’s crouch and Sparky is more than happy to have sausage for dinner. |