ManBearPig

Al Gore is hiding behind the Bijou Theatre; if you want to get mixed up in his madness, seek the former vice president behind the pine tree at the building’s back corner.

He’s very upset about a creature on the loose—the dreaded ManBearPig—and he’s “super cereal” about its danger to public safety. Gore recruits you to stop it.

Before you can even blink, Al Gore befriends you. It’s the fastest friend request on record, and you’ll soon regret every torturous minute of it.

To track down ManBearPig, you must place three sensors around South Park. Start with the farm. Climb the ladder to reach the loft window, and then climb the ladder to the roof, where you can affix the sensor to the weather vane.

Next, head down to Kenny’s garage. Inside the garage, climb the mattress ramp and shoot out the rubble to gain access to the roof ladder.

Climb atop Kenny’s garage and attach the sensor to the telephone poll near the large transformer.

Now race over to the opposite end of town and look for the forest fire sign on the shores of Stark’s Pond. Tape the sensor right to the forest fire sign.

Return to Al Gore by the Bijou Theatre. He dubs you a “Junior Al Gorean” and asks that you meet him in his secret headquarters for the next leg of your journey.

Travel to the U-Stor-It storage lot. If you haven’t already opened the main gate, you’ll have to sneak in. Take the ramp next to the vagrant merchant and stand atop the garbage bin. Shoot the ladder on the billboard platform, and climb up once it descends. Cross the billboard and drop down on the other side into the storage area.

Loop around back to the 200 series of storage areas. Gore’s headquarters is the first storage locker, marked 204.

The storage area is decked out like a missing persons unit dedicated to finding MBP (ManBearPig). Gore hands you the ManBearPig Defilibrator and gives you the hint that it needs to be activated underground.

What’s the only underground space in South Park? The sewer. Use the manhole cover in front of the South Park Gazette and descend into the gloom. Jump the gap with your alien probe and bypass the first sewage pipe to reach the power generator near the Hankeys’ house. Plug in the Defilibrator and gather your information on MBP.

Return to Al Gore. He congratulates you on a job well done to this point and says he’ll update you when the MBP readings come in.

Leave and go about your business on your next quest. Soon enough you’ll be spammed by an anxious Al Gore, who’s paranoid that MBP is hunting him down and is even now outside his headquarters. Race back to U-Stor-It as soon as you can, and you begin on the “Unfriend Al Gore” sub-quest. When you bust into the headquarters—nothing. There’s no ManBearPig, but a paranoid Gore thinks it’s all a ruse—and that you are actually MBP.

Gore attacks you, and his Super Cereal presentation attack will put even the stoutest adventurers to sleep. Resist it as best you can and fight back with stun and damage-heavy abilities.

Beware of when Gore brings in the Secret Service to fight for him. These goons are armed with automatic weapons and deal heavy damage even through Perfect Blocks. Heal with snacks and strike back with multiple-opponent abilities that max out damage on many targets.

Eventually, if you combine powerful abilities with your buddy and heal up whenever given the chance, you can take down Gore. Raid his body for the ManBearPig Ear, Health Potion (Large), and Al Gore’s Secret Room Key. Use the key to open the green “super-secret” door in the back.

Gore’s super-secret room is a replica of the oval office, complete with spotlights and camera. Gore and his ego must chat it up here on coffee breaks. Open the nearby treasure chest for the Super Cereal ManBearPig Club, ManBearPig Hoof, and Manly Pigtail Wig.

Just when you’ve forgotten about the crazy Gore, a new social networking entry pops up warning that MBP has been seen by the church. Head over to the church grounds to begin the “Defeat ManBearPig” sub-quest.

Apparently Gore hasn’t been defeated yet, and this time he’s dressed up in a costume that’s bear extremities and pig-eyed helmet. Gore, or ManBearPig as he likes to be called now, is tougher with the helmet on, so take advantage whenever he throws off his helmet by dealing heavy damage to him quickly.

Pound MBP when his helmet is off. He has a lot of health; expect a long battle, during which you and your buddy will be trading off using consumables to stay in the fight.

Once MBP puts the helmet back on, he begins regenerating. Save your power points for big-damage attacks, and make sure you execute any combos perfectly to max out your damage.

Finally, for real this time, you will defeat Gore/ManBearPig and end this nightmare. Rewrite last sentence to read: For all your efforts, you gain a bunch of experience, five bucks, and the ManBearPig Claw, but you lose a “friend.”