Relationships in The Sims 3 actually unfold not that differently from those in the real world. How you treat other Sims is the biggest metric in your overall relationship with them.
If you insult another Sim, expect them to get upset in the immediate conversation and for that to have a lasting effect on your relationship.
Conversely, a constant stream of support or praise will boost the immediate interaction and lead to a longer-lasting positive relationship.
Developing a successful romance means spotting if the other party is receptive to your advances and knowing when to cool your jets.
The social structure of The Sims 3 is not navigated with obvious metrics. There is a touch of mystery in conversations that makes socializing more organic.
You need to consider the current attitude of the Sim in the conversation, often referred to as the Target. (Your current Sim is known as the Actor.) That attitude affects the long-term status of your relationships with different Sims.
Let’s detail some basic concepts that will assist with understanding how relationships work: long-term relationship (LTR), short-term context (STC), and commodities. Understanding these three factors is the key to brushing back some of the mystery of social interaction.
Long-Term Relationship (LTR)
The long-term relationship represents the state of the relationship between two Sims, which extends beyond the time during which a conversation is taking place.
LTR essentially describes the way two Sims view each other at a given moment. Every Sim outside the family starts out as a Stranger.
Once initial contact is made, the LTR moves up to Acquaintance and can never fall back into Stranger.
However, Acquaintance is the proverbial fork in the road. From here, the LTR can blossom into friendship or deteriorate into rivalry.
The LTR is visually measured by the bar below the portrait of the Sim you are conversing with. If the relationship develops in a positive manner, the right half of the bar fills.
Positive relationship status is noted with green. If the relationship is souring, that meter empties back out and can even dip into the left side, which is red. The red bar denotes a negative LTR.
How to achieve the different LTRs is explained in the Friendships (and Enemies) section of this chapter, but here is a list of all of the LTRs:
Stranger
Acquaintance
Disliked
Distant Friend
Friend
Good Friend
Best Friend
Best Friends Forever (teens only)
Romantic Interest
Ex-Spouse
Ex
Enemy
Old Enemies
Partner
Fiancee
Spouse
Short-Term Context (STC)
Short-term contexts are what a Sim thinks about the other Sim in the course of the current conversation, not as an LTR. The STC is displayed in the conversation box in the screen’s upper-left as the conversation unfolds.
For example, the box may say that “Jenny thinks Sasha is being amusing.” STC is affected by the kind of socials used in a conversation. Each social has a commodity attached to it that directs the course of a conversation. These are all of the STCs:
Dull
Drab
Insufferably Tedious
Odd
Creepy
Frightening
Very Scary
Impolite
Insulting
Unforgivably Rude
OK
Friendly
Very Friendly
Amusing
Funny
Hilarious
Flirty
Seductive
Hot
Awkward
Very Awkward
Steamed
Not all STCs are symmetrical. One Sim can have a totally different impression of a conversation than the other.
The only symmetrical STCs are those associated with the following commodities: friendly, funny, amorous, and steamed. It is very possible that Jenny could think Sasha is being Dull while Sasha does not.
STC also modulates the way socials are accepted. Instead of just hot and cold, STCs and their respective commodities temper reactions. Depending on your LTR and STC, you can see different degrees of reaction to a social.
Trying to kiss a Sim on the cheek in the context of the Flirty STC will be a lot more successful than the Friendly STC.
Commodity
So, each STC is associated with a commodity? What’s a commodity? Think of these as the general categories a social or STC falls under. They are based on specific emotions we all feel, such as awkwardness or love.
Use the commodity of a social to inspire an STC, which in turn affects the overall LTR. Here are the seven commodities:
Boring
Creepy
Insulting
Friendly
Funny
Amorous
Awkward
Steamed
As you look at the different STCs and socials in this chapter, check the associated commodities so you can push a conversation in the desired direction.
Decay and Normalizing
Relationships do not operate under inertia. They decay over time if not tended to, even if that time period is as short as 24 hours. This is why regular socializing is so important.
Decay is not necessarily a negative slide.
While positive relationship can indeed decay into mere Acquaintance, a negative relationship can normalize into the far more desirable Acquaintance. (Apparently Sims don’t keep grudges quite like we do.)
As mentioned, the STC of a conversation contributes to LTR decay. These commodities dictate the decay. The amount of decay is also determined by the LTR itself.
An LTR above zero, which starts heading toward positive territory, will have a different amount of decay from a specific STC/commodity than a negative LTR, which is below zero.
No hard math on-screen shows the numerical value of an LTR, but you can sort of eyeball it.
Here’s an example of how this decay works: Jenny and Sasha are Good Friends. If their last encounter was Impolite, then after a few days, the LTR will decay to just Friends.
Conversely, if Jenny and Sasha have the Disliked LTR, the relationship will normalize into Acquaintance if the last STC was Friendly.
Friendships (and Enemies)
Now that we’ve explained the four basics of socialization—LTR, STC, commodity, and decay—let’s look at how relationships bloom and wither...and what you can do to affect the course of these relationships.
Naturally, Sims want friends. Social is a need, after all. Socializing and having friends have various effects on the course of your Sims’ lives.
Friendships are a universally positive thing. Having friends, particularly in an expanded social circle, opens you up to a wealth of opportunities for receiving good moodlets.
Positive moodlets are the key to earning those coveted Lifetime Rewards.
Friendships can result in such pleasing moodlets as Flattered or Nicely Decorated, such as if you are invited over to a friend’s house that has some great environmental bonuses.
Achieving the different LTRs is done through conversations—and conversations are made up of socials. But there is much more to a conversation/STC than just employing a handful of socials.
A Sim’s personality is hugely important in determining which socials can be used—and should be used. And it’s not only the traits of the Actor that matter. Learning the traits of the Target is also quite important.