We’ve already shown you all that you need to do to earn the cult-ending that Joseph’s story provides, but now we want to go in-depth on how you can woo this hunky church-lover and pick up his original ending. Below you’ll find all the details that you need—including choices, directions, and more—to earn the ending and unlock Joseph’s photograph for your collection.
How to Get Joseph’s Ending
After you and Amanda arrive in town, Joseph will stop by with a plate and some goodies. This is the first step to hit as you move into your wooing of the God-loving man, and you’ll want to select the option to return his plate as soon as you get it. This will allow you to head over to his home and meet a few of his children.
From here, make sure you do not go watch the game, and don’t meet up with Craig at the gym. From there, continue through the game until you reach the backyard barbeque and then choose the option to talk to Joseph and Damien. Once that’s out of the way, enjoy a burger, and then later on the Dadbook will pop up and you’ll want to fill it in with the following options.
- Polish and sort my coin collection.
- A boat, obviously.
- A well-manicured lawn.
- Salty boat captain.
- Romantic comedies.
- Doing a 1,000-piece puzzle together.
- A sensible cardigan.
- Potential ends of the world.
Now that the Dadbook is filled out, you should get the option to message Joseph and set up your first date with him. Nevermind the fact that he has a wife, this is all about the romance, so once you get to the date, be sure to choose the following dialogue options to push things forward and pull off a nice, smooth S Rank.
- Egg them on.
- Go with something obscure.
- Spoon duel the Spider King.
- Oh yeah!
- We improvised.
- Remember that one time.
- They seem nice.
- Brownies fix everything.
Once the first date is finished, and you’ve earned your S Rank, continue through the game until you get the option to head out on a second date with Joseph. This time around you’ll head to the lake, where you should choose the following options while talking to Joseph.
- Jesus is calming.
- That’s not how DJ’ing works.
- Start with the Lawnmower.
- Running man.
- Cabbage patch.
- Death drop.
- Watch out for blown flip flops.
After earning an S Rank on the second date, you should get the option to meet Mary (Joseph’s wife) at the bar. Head there and say whatever you like (it doesn’t seem to matter at this point in time). Once that’s taken care of, head out on your third and final date with Joseph. Once on the date, be sure to rock the following choices to score an A Rank, which appears to be the highest rank available for this dad right now.
- Can do.
- I had lobster last week and I can’t wait to eat more of you.
- (Power that radio mini game).
- Wine!! Power pour.
- Do you like your mysteries… hot bodied?
- This view, though.
- What’s it like owning a yacht?
At this point you’ll unlock Joseph’s ending and you’ll pick up a sweet new photograph for your collection. Be sure to check out how to unlock Joseph’s secret ending, which we hope will make its way into the game soon.